For the Socially Awkward Girls: It's Normal and You Can Overcome It

I used to be that girl: the girl that was afraid of being around people. The girl who thought that if she talked too much, she'd say the wrong things; so she said few words but would soon end up feeling isolated. The girl that wasn't so good with her words so she stayed quiet, later feeling outdone by others wishing she was more social. The girl who would always be found sitting in the back of the room rather than towards the front... sometimes I still feel like that girl.

If this sounds like you; getting anxious around others, often emotionless towards people that it drives them away, talking too little or too much, etc., there is nothing wrong with you. It is normal to be in the social awkward stage. It happens to most of us. And if you believe you're the only one, truth be told, you aren't. But please know that God hasn't called you to hide for that fact. God has not called you to fear, He's called you to life and much more.

Don't allow the fear of people's opinions of you cause you to isolate yourself.

Social awkwardness results from overthinking and the need to be perfect. If you're like me, you tend to overthink a lot. We can overthink about something so much to the point that it can cause us to create problems in our heads. Understand that overthinking is the result of fear. We begin to fear what other people think of us. We begin to fear the future. We begin to even fear and doubt if God truly even loves us after what we've done.

Social awkwardness leads up to developing low self-esteem. It can push you further away from family and friends, make you feel small compared to others, causing you to believe that you are less than who you are in your identity in Christ, which is not true.

The mind is the enemy's play field. The enemy plants fear, worry, and doubt by feeding lies. Once a thought of worry or fear enters our minds, we'll tend to ponder on that thought and the longer we do, the more capable we are of believing those lies. Listening to the lies of the enemy, makes us unable to hear God's truth: that He is with us always (Isaiah 41:40). That we are to be bold and courageous, and that our strength is in and through Christ Jesus (Joshua 1:9, Deuteronomy 31:6). That He shall supply our every need and that we lack nothing (Philippians 4:19). That God made no mistake when His thoughts concerned you (Psalms 139:14).

It's important to take captive of every thought or else every thought will take captive of you. Refuse to be a prisoner within your own mind. Don't let what you think others think of you along with the lies of the enemy, allow you to think lowly of yourself and be isolated from your loved ones.

Being socially awkward can keep you from having the relationships & friendships God wants you to have.

If we can be honest, we all want friends who not only we could associate with but accept and appreciate us for who we really are, but we can't receive good true friendships if we don't be ourselves. Fear of being judged and embarrassed causes us to not act as ourselves. This lack of confidence hinders you from walking in your true given identity. Acting as we usually wouldn't doesn't just give us a false identity, it gives us false friendships.

God wants to bless you with relationships & for you to prosper in them. He won't just give you friends that'll see you for who you are, He'll give you friendships that'll help push you towards becoming the person God wants you to be despite of your social awkwardness. Don't let your awkwardness keep you from experiencing the blessings that come with good friendships.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

Most times, we can be our worst critics. We'll be encouraging and be kind to others yet we can be pretty hard on ourselves. If you mess up, whether it's giving a speech in speech class or stumbling on your words while talking to someone, it's okay. When little things like this happen, learn to laugh it off. Embrace yourself and your quirks; after all, they're what make you, you.

If you want to get better at them, do so, but don't put yourself down for making a tiny little hiccup. Stop allowing social awkwardness restrict you from reaching your full potential! Educate yourself on how to communicate and connect well with others. Educate yourself on how to interact in social settings. There are other ways to build yourself up instead of breaking yourself down over a harmless mistake.

Don't let the thought of you being socially awkward and the identity of being an introvert stop you from pursuing God's purpose for you.

The bible tells us that we are not given a spirit of timidity but a spirit of power and confidence through Jesus Christ that we have the access and ability to walk in (1 Timothy 1:7). You have an amazing gift building up inside you, but you're afraid that your social awkwardness will come up again so you hide in your bubble. You believe that your awkwardness and shy quality disqualifies you from the big plans He has in store for you.

Think again. He is able to use you despite your weakness and faults and use them for your strengths. Nothing as small as social awkwardness can even stop you or God from fulfilling His purpose for you.

When you take time to know the Creator, you get to know yourself.

Not everyone is perfect. There is no such thing. You can look up all the articles, read on all the how-to books, etc. but none of that'll beat getting to know the Creator for yourself. He makes no mistake in what He creates, therefore, you my love, are uniquely made in His image. The more secure you are in Him, the less subjected you are to sulk when social anxiety springs up and worry about what others think of you.

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Gaining self confidence and overcoming social awkwardness & anxiety is an ongoing process and will take time. Don't be so hard on yourself. Take it one step at a time. Be present. You are not socially awkward, you are unique. Embrace your social awkwardness, for it can actually do you good. You can overcome this. He's called you to come out of your bubble, come out out of your favorite corner and to come out of your mindset. Don't allow social anxiety to hinder you from the fullness of life God has promised you.

Dear Lord,

Thank you Lord that not only do you hear and take in every word we speak and request, but simply because you care. I pray those reading come to you with their requests about this, that they not be anxious because they know You are the answer to their problems (Philippians 4:6). Father God I pray for any girl who is harboring any feeling of inadequacy, that you replace that feeling with boldness. I pray that You give them the words to speak, and the right actions to display that will lead others to You. I pray they first find their identity & worth in You Lord. Praying they give this to You so You may use it for their good and Your glory. In Your name, Amen.